I love summer. I love laying out in the hot sun on my porch. I love lingering light at 10pm. I love things that grow, things that sprout, things that I can eat that only grow in summer.
 

I grew up on the northern shores of Lake Michigan, and so summer has always meant time on the water. My friend Molly lived right on the lake, and me and our other friend Tracy spent most of our days swimming & making mischief while documenting it on a series of underwater cameras we'd then run into town to develop at the one-hour photo lab. When I moved to Chicago, I spent endless hours training the for the marathon, running up and down Lake Shore Drive along the water or downtown, criss crossing back and forth across the Chicago River bridges. Our New England years were spent at places like Hammonasset Beach (we prefer East Beach), Touisset Point, or shuttling from Brooklyn to Manhattan on the East River ferry. But now at our little shoreline town in southeast Wisconsin, we live 5 blocks from Lake Michigan. Time on the water is something I'm never short of.

This summer I hope to do more sessions while on the road, which is why I'm announcing my summer travel dates.

Click here to inquire!

Even though I'm local to Chicago all year round, I plan to be in Chicago more during the month of July, and even squeeze in a trip to Traverse City to see my little sis.

August, we're heading on our (now) annual summer road trip to Rhode Island and I CAN'T WAIT! Plus, all you New England friends...we're planning a few extra days to be in Connecticut to make the rounds and we'd love to see you! I'm thinking, a drop in dinner at Mondo or Heirloom? What do you think?

Email me directly at alicia@hitherandhold.com -or- Design Your Session here!

I sat on the couch, cozily nestled between my sleeping fevered babe and my favorite pillow and blanket. With the snow falling outside, Andrew and I were resigned to our perches in the living room - battling the urge to binge watch a whole season of The West Wing...you know, just a typical Monday night.

We decided that this Monday would be different...with Stella sleeping her fever off soundly in my arms we did not need the likes of Sam Seaborn waking her and so the TV remained off. I picked up my newest copy of Magnolia Magazine and flipped to the front page, I started to read, with Joanna's voice in my head narrating all along. All the other things I had...or rather, "should" do interrupted my thoughts. I need to blog, I need to edit, I need to do the dishes and the mountain of months old laundry residing on our basement floor. I need a plan, I said. I need a plan to do it all.

I sometimes want to become a person who does all the things - but what I need to become a person who does the important things.

Because when I plan to do it all, I fail. You know why? Because I don't plan, I just jump in and try to do, do do as fast as I can and I always end up nowhere. Because honestly, a PLAN to do all the things would make me realize I can't do ALL THE THINGS (Can I say that more times?)

I want to become a woman who does important things. Because of important things matter. Important things aren't an emergency. Important things are the things that need to be done...that matter when they are finished...that move us towards becoming more of who we want to be.

So that snowy evening with the dusky pink sky...I resigned to the fact that if I fail to plan, I plan to fail. And I am not interested in becoming a woman who fails at the un-important things. (I'm totally fine and am in fact, an expert at failing to do unimportant things and that's cool with me).

And within the pages of Magnolia Journal, my plan sprang up at me. In the words of our dear Joanna...a plan for the Hither & Hold blog fell into my lap.

What inspired me is her quarterly magazine.

And Each quarter she chooses a theme or a virtue that they want to dive deep into and look at from various angles. "Rather than present these as simple platitudes, we seek to make them tangible fruit: there for the taking, enjoying, and nourishing." 

My plan for this blog is this.

to be a place for important things to be written, shared, celebrated and loved. Things not just important to me, but important for us to become who we were truly born to become.

So this quarter - April, May & June - we will focus on the word becoming. I can't wait to share the next couple words with you, but I'm going to sit on them for the next month or so and truly be sure they're themes & virtues that ring true to the Hither & Hold message, our community and my inspiration because of people like you.

Come with me on this journey - a journey of becoming. I can't wait to see where we go.

Tell me in the comments below...what comes to mind when you hear the word BECOMING?

I curled up to the fleece blanket a little closer as I flicked through the channels. Food Network seemed like a safe choice for binge watching that January afternoon, now almost ten years ago. Post-college life only allowed a few days at home at a time, and although the entire four years prior I had been thinking of ways to get out of the house when I was home - now that the time was limited I wanted to stay in as much as possible.

I remember my first episode of Barefoot Contessa as plain as day. Say it with Food is the name of the episode, and Ina brings a breakfast basket to a friend filled with fabulous things because, well, she's fabulous.

Yesterday I did my first craazy long Instagram story about making Gluten Free Corn Muffins for my friends. Each Tuesday we host community group/small group at our house and we use to just randomly here and there do a potluck. But I realized it stressed everyone out to run and pick up something right before our 6:30pm group time, and our group FAR TOO MUCH enjoyed the eating and socializing and we'd be left with 30 minutes for our actual Bible Study. So when our church announced it would be doing a church-wide small group study called "40 Days of Community" I decided we needed just that - community.
So we opened our house up even earlier than before (doors open at 5:45pm!) and dinner would be ready and waiting - please just bring yourselves.

Here's the trick.

A couple of folks in our group have food allergies...and everyone is a little bit of a gourmand so pizza every week would not do. So using my new favorite website called Plan to Eat, I plan each week to have a gluten free, highly delicious and super simple meal for my people. It's my way of serving. It's my way of loving. I just say it with food.

Ina's Gluten Free Skillet Corn Bread

Last week we had a crazy lake effect snowstorm that dumped almost 2 feet of snow on little ole' Racine. So the big pot of chili I had made needed to be frozen and saved for next week (when you've just finished making dinner for 14 people - you gotta save that puppy for when the 14 people are actually coming). So this week, as the chili thawed, I whipped up my favorite corn bread recipe, minus the gluten. A simple swap of Bob's Red Mill All Purpose Gluten Free Flour did just the trick.

Ingredients

• 3 cups all-purpose flour (regular or gluten free!)
• 1 cup sugar
• 1 cup medium cornmeal
• 2 tablespoons baking powder
• 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
• 1 1/2 cups whole milk
• 1/2 pound unsalted butter, melted and cooled
• 2 extra-large eggs

Directions
1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F with your skillet inside to get hot.
2. In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with a paddle attachment, mix the flour, sugar, cornmeal, baking powder, and salt.
3. In a separate bowl, combine the milk, melted butter, and eggs.
4. With the mixer on the lowest speed, pour the wet ingredients into the dry ones and stir until they are just blended.
5. Remove the skillet from the oven and grease the pan one of two ways. Either a) spray with cooking spray or b) place a tablespoon of butter in the pan and spread it around the hot skillet until it melts.
5. Spoon the batter into the skillet, filling it almost to the top. (there is enough batter for two batches...I just baked my second half in a cake pan).
6. Bake for ~20 minutes, until the top is crisp and a toothpick comes out clean.
7. Cool slightly and remove from the pan.

California has always been this echo in my life story. I grew up hearing stories of my first big trip at nine months old to California and Disneyland. One of my best friends from high school went to college in SoCal and I was always scheming a way to go visit her. My roommate in college was from California. Ten years ago Andrew and I took our first big vacation together to visit friends in the Santa Cruz area and we went surfing, saw seals and did all the touristy San Francisco things. One of my besties lives in LA and after a timely and much needed visit one cold, snowy January I couldn't stop dreaming about going back. Last year, a whirlwind trip to our now beloved beach house solidified my friendship with three lovely ladies I call my Biz Besties.  

And now the company I work for is nestled on a quiet street in the SoMa neighborhood in San Francisco. Last month I went out there for a week to work and naturally my biz besties couldn't stay away. They all came from thier corners of the country and we had a day together that was so delightful and filling that when it was over I couldn't help but think "I can't wait until our next opportunity to be together again!"

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Have you ever had a place be on your heart and never in a million years would you think it would be a part of your story? That's what California is to me and I couldn't be more grateful of the role it plays in my story. 💛 

Last year my friends Shaina & Treacy introduced me to something called Dressing Your Truth. It's an energy profiling system that helps you make your outside (clothes, hair, habits) reflect your inside! At first I was skeptical when I got the 'Type 1' energy profile because absolutely nothing about it reflected my outside look - although I was in agreement with everything it outlined for my personality and features.

The past couple years as I was building out my Hither & Hold brand I focused on darker colors...pinks with black & gray then blues and golds...and honestly the past year I felt like no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get the right fit for my design. You should know, I'm a graphic designer and so that is a little bit of a blessing and a curse. I could never just settle on a design it seemed. I would create something beautiful, but it didn't feel me and I could not figure out why.

Around new years I was reading this color psychology chart  (if you haven't figure out by now, I love psychology!) and in reading the descriptions of all the colors I learned why I never felt at home. The message I was sending through my color choices was NOT the one I intended. So I decided NOT to look at the color and only read the feeling descriptions of the colors. And that's when I read this:

Peach - PMS 162C Positive: nurturing, soft, fuzzy, tactile, delicious, fruity, sweet tasting, sweet smelling, inviting, warm, physical comfort, intimate, modest, embracing.

Inviting. Warm. Intimate. Embracing. All adjectives used by my clients after their photo sessions.

I looked at the color. Peach. I had a reaction I didn't know how I felt about. Peach felt weak. Peach felt 'predictable'. Peach felt NOT ME. (or atleast the me I thought I should project)

And then I revisited my Dressing Your Truth colors. Peach fit perfect into the colors I was trying to wear more of, and always felt best when wearing (like pinks and oranges and yellows). I looked at my old inspiration boards, and that's when I found this image.

It was an image that I had pinned on every photograph inspiration board I ever had. I even remember once I tried to pull a color swatch from the image and was surprised that it was actually peach, not pink.

Peach, it seemed, had been following me. Subconsciously, and hiding right in plain sight. I felt like once I stopped trying to make something work because of an ideal I had in my head, and just opened my eyes to what was already in front of me - the perfect fit was there. 

So please! Poke around my new website and leave me a comment about what you love! 

As the files trickled one by one into my Dropbox I eagerly clicked and double clicked into the files to see what I didn't know would be just what I needed.

It seems, every few months or so my foot gets caught in a trap...of comparison, of bad self-talk, of really honestly thinking I can't do anyyything and I find myself asking God,

"Hey...I know you want me to lay this down....that is what you're saying right? Because I'm listening...God send me a sign if I'm suppose to walk away from this whole dream and just be ____, ____ or ____."

(Fill in what you will...most times lately it's filled in with 'just a mom').

So when Kristen was sending me the video clips she had taken from the session I had done with my friends Treacy & Jay in California last month, I couldn't help but think "Why bother". I was going to give this up, lay it down, let it go. Dreams don't come true I guess, and while it was nice that Kristen was sending me the files, this was so last week for me.

And then I started opening them one by one. And cue the tears, tears, runny nose...all the things. What I saw with my eyes is just what I needed and didn't know it.

Kristen had given me a taste of my own medicine...and it's exactly what I needed.

When I photograph my couples, I see it as an opportunity to create an experience for them to connect. To share about the past & future...where they've come from and where they're going. I tell them to play, to hold each other, to share their dreams for the future, and to ask them to hold each other in a way that would take away all the pain they had ever felt. To be reminded why they journey this life together.

And so when I saw these video clips, I saw why I do these things. I was transported back to that breezy evening at Muir Beach with people in long coats and 14 year olds swimming in the cold Pacific waters. To Treacy & Jay holding each other, and them telling one another why they fell in love with each other, and why they keep loving each other. I was given a new perspective on what I create every time I pick up a camera, and how it makes me feel. Those moments where the perfect light, the perfect hold, and the perfect connection makes me go click on the shutter to save that moment. And the experience I create and have with my people...it was shown to me in a whole new light.

Thank you Kristen, you have given me such a gift. You have no idea what a reminder of that experience would bring to my spirit to keep pursuing what I was born to do.

I'd love for you to check out my new 1 minute video! More videos to come because Kristen knocked it out of the park and got SOOO many goodies...enjoy <3

Hither & Hold Launch

Welcome welcome WELCOME! I am so ELATED to have you here, on my blog, for the launch of my new website Hither & Hold.

It's been a long journey for me to get to this place, and I am so excited that you're here with me, celebrating today!

Four years ago yesterday (ironically) I launched my first website. Pink and brown flowers with my handwriting incorporated in the design. A small announcement in the middle of the night. Back then, I was scared. Of this idea I could actually DO this. Of putting myself out there. To being true to myself.

It's been a long road since then. Moving cross country and back, a baby, job transition, loss and gains. But that small seed of what sparked all this to begin has grown and bloomed. I can honestly say, Hither & Hold is what I have always had in me but never knew what it was or how to communicate it.

What I have always known is, I wanted to tell stories. I'm that child growing up that always got excessive talking marked on her report card. Who wrote short stories fearlessly, and made copies for her relatives to read at Easter and Thanksgiving. So when I found a camera in my hand, it became a natural extension of my storytelling.

The stories I tell with my camera have meaning beyond the frame. A special gift between to the beholder...to look at a photograph and draw close to that moment and thousands of others that led up to it. When we moved away from Chicago in 2011, my 25 year old self clung to a photograph of us taken the week before we moved. I clung to the story of my life up until that point. I clung to the plot lines, twists and turns that had brought me to that place. And I held it dear. It helped me grieve. It helped me find peace. It helped me find joy again, because I knew if we could be so happy there, we could be so happy here again. That all the things that brought us up to that moment were within us to be brought up again...it was hope...possibility...love.

The word hither means 'to or toward this place'. It came to me in a sacred moment. Pen on the page, Hither was scribbled between the lines. I didn't even know what it really meant, so I looked it up in the dictionary.

'To this place'

Pairing that idea with photographs, I knew immediately 'place' it was referring to because I had been there often. I knew a companion to the word hither was hold. Because that's what we do. We draw close and hold those moments dear. Moments within seasons of faithfulness. Seasons of peace. Seasons of grieving. Seasons of change.

I always had this fear: "I don't want to just be another 'lady with a camera' - but I know now that is what I am. A woman with a camera in my hands, and that camera is how I will do the work I've been given here on earth - to reveal the sacredness of seasons of life, and make markers in the journey for you to hither & hold.

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I invite you to explore. To click into all the pages and read the words that have been brewing in me for so long. And stay tuned this week - TWO amazing giveaways are coming! More details will be here on the blog, and on social media, so please! Follow Hither & Hold on Instagram & Facebook, and sign up to receive my VIP email HERE.

This week is ending in a way that none of us thought was really possible...I don't think any of us truly believed it would happen the way the cards have fallen. And I know you might be freaking out. I know that earlier this week, it may have seemed like there was no end. You might have been hung over emotionally (or literally)...you might have felt helpless, hopeless, anything but light-filled.

But today...I hope you can look in the mirror and see a new day. A brighter day. A day that may or may not be perfect, but gosh darn it we want to find the goodness. I don't want to take my life for granted, and neither do you. That's no way to live.

Step into the light, dear friend. Let it wash over you and bask it it's rays. Eyes closed...let's dream. Dream of a world where we invite joy in regardless of who the president is, what our job titles are, what size we are, or the number on the scale. That doesn't mean we can ignore the darkness - it means maybe we can be a change. A spark that starts a fire to light up the room.

Open your palms and Breathe - "I will invite joy into my life regardless of its circumstances. I will let the light of the sun wash over me and remind me that He is still good even when the world is not. And I will let this light energize me. Power my batteries. To do the work that I need to do in these days that seem so helpless for my brothers, sisters, and sometimes myself."

We know that each day, these words will not ring true with the same power they may today. They may fall flat. They may seem hopeless. But these are the building blocks of light making. Joy ushering. Peace rumbling.

I want to build a legacy that always invited joy into the middle of my circumstances even when life doesn't seem good. To draw near to that light that is brighter on days when it's not. And to set example for the world around me that we can do this better together.

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Up until the other day, all the frames that hung above my desk were empty. They were still filled with the stock photo that they came with...and the quote on all 4 of them said "Art Enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time". Lost and found. The dichotomy of loss and gain is the balance that life needs. Without it we are too much or not enough.

But to loose ourself or be open hearted to any new idea...there is a small grief. Grief of a beloved idea, grief of new curiosities pursuing us. Both gain & loss requires bravery. And trust. And determination. In that we find equilibrium.

My work has come from both gain and loss in the past 12 months.

12 months ago I thought my calling was to tell City Stories. Plain and simple. Stories of skylines and the people who lived in them. Born from a love developed for a place, and it became stale in my attempts to make it happen.

And as I dug to create from a place of pure sincerity, I found city stories to be the part of art i needed to lose. And that was hard. To loosen myself from this idea that had been at the heart of so much of my drive and my story.

But art, as art can do, helped me find myself again. At a deeper place. A more honest and open place.

Because while my calling as a photographer is to marriage, the deepest level of my call is to story.

Hither & Hold. Alicia Sturdy. Whatever I create on a page or with a photograph. It's not about marriage. It's not about weddings. It's not about websites. It's not about logos. It's not about the frames. It's not about the albums. It's not about iMacs and watercolors.

It's about the story. The journey.

It's a spark...whatever that may be. A vow, a loss, a gain, an inspiration. That creates more than just a flash of light that burns out faster than it was created, it's a flame. That when coaxed burns brighter than in those first moments of inception.

The fan to the flame is remembering the story. To believe that each moment in the story shapes who we are and that it's worthy to be called attention to.

The darkest moments, the brightest days.

This Altar, this act that ensures we will remember the pain or joy or sorrow or goodness of that moment - create threads of in your life...your journey...that weave together to create the testimony to whatever the altar holds.

Alicia Sturdy and Andrew Sturdy #TBT Black and White Snapshot

Do you print your pictures? Confession, I don’t. Lame, right? Skimming through the contents of my external hard drive, I came across this photo of Andrew and I. Chances are my grandchildren will not be cruising my Instagram feed in 25 years and see this picture. They will not pull out my external hard drive and dig through all the mislabeled files. Printing this picture, I can give them something real. Sure, it’s a snapshot. I’m sure the photos that will get handed down to them will be of more importance - our wedding photo, other important life events. But what they won’t see if this lives on my hard drive, is the everyday us. The us that isn’t perfectly made-up or in our Sunday best. The us they will miss is the real us. And that actually is the one I want them to know the most.

I keep forgetting that Christmas is next week...NEXT WEEK! Friday! I know today is Tuesday, and technically Christmas is 10 days away, not a week. But you know how the week of Christmas goes...last minute shopping, Christmas cards, decorating, grocery shopping, cleaning. I am already feeling a tiny pinch of anxiety about cleaning my house (right after my family was here this past weekend, and my inlaws were here for Thanksgiving!). And I think it's easy to lean into the holidays to avoid the new year coming. I want to savor Christmas and Advent as a time of peace and anticipation and then suddenly the new year comes barreling through the door and I'm suddenly thinking about what I did wrong in the past year that I don't want to repeat in the next. Something that has been tapping me on the shoulder quite a bit these days is the thought of 'gratitude'. Two women I love to follow online, Lara Casey & Sue Bryce, are gratitude champions (in my humble opinion). They both use gratitude as a tool in their life in businesses that makes me want what they have (and I don't think of this as coveting because I know I can have gratitude as well!).

Quote by Melody Beattie: "Gratitude turns what we have into Enough" | #HITHERandHOLD - Alicia Sturdy

Click here to download this iPhone background

Today I'm going to make a list of all the things I'm grateful for in my life. Because instead of thinking of all the things I don't have, I want to focus on the things I do.

1. A relationship with Jesus

2. Clean water

3. Healthy food (thinking about that bunch of kale in my fridge!)

4. Stella

5. Andrew

6. Mom

7. Dad

8. Melissa

9. Kaylee

10. Kace

11. Kim

12. Rob

13. Katilyn

14. Christopher

15. That we moved this year so close to family that we have seen them all more in the past 30 days than we did the 4 years we were in Connecticut

16. Our house that fell into our laps and is perfect for us in so many ways

17. A healthy, encouraging and loving Church

18. Andrew's co-workers

19. A business that allows me to stay home

20. Work that lets me be who I am

21. A past that, while at times has been hard, has blessed us in ways we never could have imaged

22. Socks (my feet are so cold right now!)

23. A car that works

24. A neighborhood that is safe, beautiful, and again...perfect for us

25. A washing machine (uhh...we were laundromat people for 2 years...)

26. My computer

27. My camera

28. The opportunity to attend two conferences this year

29. Friends from all areas of my life that I am still in contact with and love me for who I am

30. A driveway

31. Living near the lake

32. My hobby of cooking, I love doing it and it provides joy and...well, dinner, for my family

33. For failures this year

34. For successes this year

35. My old jobs that have provided for me and pushed me to become who I am

Making a list of things I'm grateful for...overall and from the past year...helps me remember the goodness in my life. What are you grateful for this year? Share it in the comments below, I'd love to make this post all about celebrating blessings and goodness beyond just myself.

PS: If you're making your list, and have a tug at your heart to hold on to the goodness this year as brought, let me help you make an altar to remember. My Hither & Hold portrait sessions are designed specifically to capture the power of these moment and gives you the gift of treasuring all those things within the beauty of a photograph. Bookings are available for 2016, visit my website for all the information!

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PPS: Here is a moment from this past weekend I'm grateful for...the sweetness of Stella's spirit (now that's alliteration!)

I think everyone is familiar with the feeling of longing. That fire in our bellies that isn't burning at full blast, but is a slowly stoked flame that drives us either into desperation or despair. I don't know what direction this longing is telling me to do - but I do know that it told me to put pen to paper (or fingers to keys!) and talk about it.

Last week I planned out my blog. I created this whole big spreadsheet...which is huge for me because I don't like spreadsheets and I am the biggest ENFP/enneagram7/type B personality you could ever find. I have other tools in my business that help me organize, but spreadsheets really are not one of them.

So this spreadsheet tells me what I am to write every Tuesday and Thursday. And I planned out the topics until the end of February (because really who wants to write about something in August that you thought up in December). I do this for consistency, I do this for accountability, I do this for my own scatterbrain.

But one thing I can't help but shake is just letting this scatterbrain let her do her scattered thing. To give her space to write what is on her heart...and I think I'll let her do just that.

Monday - a day I'm 'not suppose to write'...I am slated to work on a logo project, a Showit Design, and brainstorm some marketing ideas. But I found myself thrown off track (it involved a spilled glass of milk, a spoiled almond milk smoothie, and ended in bacon and eggs that could make any wrong day right). My journal at my side, and my "Write the Word" journal (get one here, it has changed my life) open - I found myself with a feeling of longing. Of what, I'm not sure...but it involved God.

I hesitate to talk about God sometimes because I don't want to push people away. I don't want you to judge me...for how spiritual or unspiritual I am. But I can't help it. I have to talk about this part of myself that is feeding this fire in my belly.

I flipped up a few of my favorite blogs that always give me a little boost in terms of my spirituality. Encouragement to listen smaller or harder...peace that I am not alone in this pursuit. But I couldn't find any of those same whispers or voices that give me that God Boost.

And it made me think...I want to know what you're longing for. I want to know what fire is in YOUR belly. Is it a baby, a new house, a new job, time alone, time together? What is it?

Because when we are open hearted and honest about things sometimes, that open door lets healing in. It makes things happen. When you send that longing out into the universe, it lets relief in.

What are you longing for?

Sunday we decorated for Christmas. We have lived in four different places in the past 5 years (wow...I never thought about that until now!) so each apartment had a specific place where all the Christmas stuff went. In our first apartment in grad school, our 800~ square foot apartment meant our tiny tree seemed enormous and Christmas exploded onto every ledge and shelf we had available. Our cute little yellow house in Middletown was built in the 1830's - so we had a beautiful old fireplace and a cozy nook for our tree to go in (the first and only year we've had a REAL tree!). The open, airy place we had in Hartford had 15 windows throughout the apartment - so we put a candle in each (and had to go to 3 different Targets to find the $1 battery operated candlesticks because BOY is that an investment otherwise!). And now our cozy cape in Racine...with the green walls that give it an instant Christmas vibe and the window box in the front that Stella likes to climb up on and play with said candles in the window (also our first Christmas with a 1.5 year old...oy). But as I was determining the best place for our 'heirloom' Christmas tomte collection to go (up high on the fireplace...see note about the 1.5 year old) - had a thought. From the northside of Chicago to the rolling hills of Connecticut, to the lakeshore in Racine - as long as Andrew is here...I'm home.

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Within my new brand, is a phrase 'Hither & Hold'. The word 'hither' means 'to or towards this place'. The minute I read it, I knew it was meant to be mine.

Because even though #tbt comes and goes every week (and may seem like a weird internet fad)...we look back to hold those moments a little closer. We look back on those photographs to remember that time, that moment, that place. To feel that spark once again. The spark that makes our souls long for that connection once more.

So where do you hither? What do you want to hold? Let's start a Hither & Hold movement. Deeper than Thursday...deeper than where we've been before. Today, my place I want to #hitherandhold is this photo. To us two, on a cold December day. In that season of life that holds so much sweetness in our marriage. That is where I want to hither, and what I want to hold.

I have started this blog post more times than you can imagine, but I just need to be plain and simple about it. MY NEW BRAND IS FINALLY HERE.

The journey & calling for me and this new brand has been brewing since October 2013 (!) and has gone through revision upon revision. I can't wait to debrief all that has gone into this journey...because BOY as it been a long one! But first, I want to share with you a little bit about what my new brand is all about.

It starts with two very little words.

Hither & Hold.

The word hither means 'to this place' - and that definition has enchanted me. Every artist needs a muse, and HITHER & HOLD is mine.

The HITHER & HOLD movement is about marking time for the future to look back on and be reminded of the love, goodness and grace enclosed within a photograph.

HITHER & HOLD is a new portraiture for married life.

It is a testimony.

It is an altar.

It's a doorway back to this moment, to hither to this place, and hold it dear.

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Come on in, friend. Welcome.

www.aliciasturdy.com

Can't wait to share more coming up in future blog posts...but for right now, welcome to a new experience.

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Thank you SO MUCH to SO many people!! My family (Mom, Dad, Melissa, Kaylee), Carri, Ashley, Michelle & Meghan, my MOIB crew (Carly, Charlene, Davina, Katelyne, Kristen, Nadeena, Robyn, Sandra, Shaina, Treacy),  Jeff Jochum, Elise & Scott of Hey Sweet Pea, Sarah, all my beautiful couples featured on the site that I've shot over the years, and of course, Andrew. Sweetheart, you are the reason why my vision exists...this journey with you is my ultimate muse to hither & hold. I love you.

Life in the city seems to speed by faster than normal, maybe it's because the city never sleeps. Stories formed here thrive by the glow of the skyline at night. Stories you point to and say "this changed us for the better".

I love to tell these stories - of couples and the closing of a chapter of their life kindled by a sacred connection with the city they love. So when Annika texted me to share the news about their upcoming move to New York (RIGHT when we were moving closer to Chicago!) I knew I had to tell their story.

We started in Lake Shore Park, where they got engaged, taxied to museum campus, where they'd run after work, and ended in their empty apartment.

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, Hither & Hold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

As their moving boxes were packed waiting to be put on the truck, I asked them to take a few minutes to breath in the last moments here. To answer the question, "Without you, this city would have felt ___" and "Before you, this city felt ___". They whispered each other secrets kept only in their heart and now between just two.

Chicago Skyline Goodbye Story - Annika & Ray | Alicia Sturdy, #hitherandhold | www.aliciasturdy.com

To view the rest of the gallery, click here (http://printshop.aliciasturdy.com/gallery/annika-ray-goodbye-session/) and don't miss the special 10 second video preview of Annika & Ray's session ONLY on my Instagram (@aliciasturdy)!

The internet is a strange place. It's a place where you can seemingly find out anything about anyone. Anything, but really sometimes nothing. The internet is a place where you can seemly get to know someone, feel like their best friend, like you know them already without even talking face to face.

I don't know what you know about me, but let's consider this our first introduction.

Hi! I'm Alicia.

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I could go on and tell you a lot of different things about me. That I'm an artist, that I'm a mom, that I'm a wife and daughter. That I could eat pizza every day (and attempted to during my 9 months of pregnancy). That I absolutely adore fizzy drinks of any kind - my two favorites being seltzer and champagne. That I love personality tests, in particular the enneagram (7 here!) and the myers briggs is growing on me (ESFP). That I drink more than 3 cups of coffee before noon, and think about what I'm having for dinner by the middle of breakfast.

But you really wouldn't know me. You would know me...but really, you don't know me. So here are a few things...my secrets and beliefs....take them or leave them.

I believe street traffic is the soundtrack of a city, listening to the honking horns and people out all hours of the night as I go to sleep is like being lulled by the city’s heartbeat.

I watch my wedding video every year on our anniversary.

I believe in raising my children be cultured; because my idea of motherhood includes weekly sushi dates with my daughter.

I know my kryptonite in cleaning is boxes of photographs; once I start walking down memory lane it’s hard for me to stop.

I wear sunglasses when I'm on the subway; it the way I can be with nobody while being surrounded by everybody.

I secretly love that my husband and I have an unwritten rule that whoever cooks doesn't have to do the dishes. I always cook.

I believe christmas doesn’t start until your first Starbucks holiday drink; in college every Christmas my girlfriends and I hold off on our holiday drinks until we celebrate ‘Evergreen Saturday’ - gingerbread latte's at Starbucks, the lighting parade down Michigan Avenue, and our yearly pilgrimage through the closed off streets to Potbellys on State & Lake.

I believe the best piece of jewelry is the one passed down at least two generations.

I have a bon vivant spirit when it comes to eating out.

I think the best friends are the ones you laugh so hard you cry with.

I am really sentimental about the chapter of life I lived in Chicago - but that doesn't mean I don't love the chapter I'm living in right now.

I believe the best peace & quiet is found in the middle of a crowded coffee shop; the anonymity brings the best silence.

I own six seasons of Ina Garten's show The Barefoot Contessa...and watch them before I go to bed.

I have been known to not think twice about suggesting after dinner cupcakes and coffee in NYC...we lived two hours away and did this A LOT.

I love having a pot of coffee on all day.

I am, at my very core, a sentimental, nostalgic sap.

I believe life is too short not to surround yourself with happy people.

I totally think pearls are better than diamonds.

I believe in long layovers, its my best excuse to spend the afternoon in the Sky Lounge.

I love Spotify am a music junkie, and I have VERY eclectic taste...my favorite playlist right now is my "ME" list.

I sing and dance when I'm alone...the last song I wanted to get up and all out dance party solo on? Cosmic Girl by Jamiroquai.

I think a healthy happy hour rotation is the best excuse for date night 5 nights a week.

I believe in taking the expressway during rush hour, because there is no better view than the skyline when you’re stuck in traffic.

I can't stand waiting a whole week for the next episode of something so I wait a whole year until it comes out all together on iTunes so I can binge watch it in a week.

I hate planning things out. If you want to get us on your calendar, ask me the day before.

I love long walks down bustling streets like Michigan Avenue, State Street, 5th Avenue or Broadway - there is something just so therapeutic about pounding out the pavement, window shopping, and absorbing the energy of the city.

I like to say it's our anniversary when taking 6am flights with the hope of scoring free mimosas when the drink cart comes by.

I love my smile. Honest! I got made fun of so much for my squinty eyed smile growing up...but it just makes me want to smile even more.

I look at photos on my iPhone every day...I want to relive the memories I've captured through those little windows to the past. My favorite app? TIMEHOP.

I think no matter how hard city life can be - with every broken car window, parking ticket, and traffic jam - that a breathtaking view of a sparkling skyline makes all the hard parts fade away.

I'm tempted to tie this up into a nice bow. Blah blah blah something nice and flowery but you know what? This is me. Take it or leave it.

I sat at my computer with this churning in my chest. It was late, 11 o'clock - and I still come home from work. I sat there - confronted by time. Being forced to acknowledge that I am in fact, growing old. (Don't worry, I haven't started using night creme yet...)

This is how it went down. I was working late at the office, and was listening to a power mix on Spotify when one of my favorite songs came on. As I typed away, the song ended and I felt the need to rewind and listen again. I found myself singing along, I do that when I'm in the office alone. Oh, but this time I felt myself really listening to the words - the words, 'while our bloods still young, so young it runs'. And in that moment, I felt differently about that line than I ever had.

In the past, when jamming (yep) out to this song - I identified with it. I felt it was about me. I felt I was singing about our blood - being so young it runs. But just now, I felt like that season was gone.

And I felt the need to write a letter. To this girl.

Dear you, you'll never know

A letter reminding her she can always find her way back home. She can always find comfort in his arms. That even though his arms change, they always stay the same.

That her heart will get ripped out and put back in by things she didn't expect. That she'll be forced to confront the person she feels she is, and the person she wants to be. Needs to be. Is told to be.

But no matter who she becomes, she'll always be able to find her way back home. She can always find the girl she once was, that the boy she still loves - here.

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and here.

View More: http://lizandryan.pass.us/lifeescape

and here.

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And every time she looks there...she'll find

A moment of love A dream A laugh A kiss A cry Our rights Our wrongs

Oh, girl, stay there

It won't stop til it's over.

While your blood's still young It's so young, it runs Don't stop 'til it's over Don't stop to surrender to everything on your shoulders today.

That moment lives in these frames. Keep them. Cherish them. Use them to know who you are, and who you've become came from here.

I walked a little bit faster to make my way down Michigan Avenue towards Annika & Ray's apartment as storm clouds loomed over the skyline behind me. Chicago is infamous for it's craaaazy storms, and I was hoping that I wouldn't be caught in the middle of yet another one. It made me think of all the times getting stuck on the bus or in traffic when a storm was brewing. Hot, humid, with nowhere to go. As I stopped at an intersection to wait for traffic to pass, I saw little dots gathering at my feet, clueing me in to what was about to come. I ducked under the bus stop waiting for the storm to pass - and it was from there I could see Annika & Ray across the street in the bus shelter there on Randolph. Once the storm passed, I hip hopped my way around the puddles to where they were. You know that part of the relationship when you're so happy the smile can't seem to disappear from you face? This, is where Annika & Ray are. And I hope it never goes away. Their connection and deep sense of home in each others arms is something you can't fake.

This weekend they're getting married, and their new home is an apartment high above Grant Park with a view of the city they love. Annika & Ray, I'm praying (like you asked!) that it doesn't rain this weekend, but know that if it does - it'll just be like the day we did your City Session together, and it'll close out with you wrapped up in each others arms like everyday should.

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A few months ago, Andrew and I went on our 'last childless vacation' and we chose to do the Amazing Life Together Getaway in Maine! I could go on and on and on about how much that week refreshed our marriage, refreshed my soul before baby, and how much fun we had with all the other couples who were there. But even months after, there is still one part of the getaway that I think about DAILY - and that's the Rules to Escape Life Together.

Rules to Live By, Alicia Sturdy Photography | Amazing Life Together | Rules to Escape By | www.amazinglifetogether.com

You can read all about Liz & Ryan's Rules to Escape by on their blog, but my favorite is 'say YES'. So many times Andrew asks me to do something for him, and my first inclination is to say "in just a minute" and then 20 minutes later actually do it. But thank sweet Jesus that Andrew does not give me the same treatment in return - almost every time I am feeding Stella I have a million requests for Andrew (i.e. I'm thirsty, I'm hungry, bring me the cheezits, can you get me the remote, can you hand me that book, can you put my slippers on my feet). I may sound like a super needy person in all those examples, but he ALWAYS says yes and never complains, never hesitates. People, he even will hold my cup with a straw in it down to me so I can get a drink (ok I'm about to get real honest and REAL LIFE with the explanation for this, feeding a baby and pumping at the same time leaves NO extra hands - I'm not just a princess who needs my husband to hold a cup of water for me!).

I was amazed by these simple rules payback when you actually put them into practice (imagine that!). And I would LOVE to hear about you trying them out as well! Put one or two into practice this next week as a little experiment oh my you will see a harvest of love in return!

I'll be choosing "Share Positivity" and "Kiss Each Other" because a) we're traveling next week and sometimes positivity and traveling DO NOT happen organically, and b) sometimes I am over sensitive about making people uncomfortable with public displays of affection, and then I never really get kissy in general! I'm going to be reporting back on Instagram next week - follow me at @aliciasturdy to get in on the love and exclusive Instagram only surprises for the new brand launch!

A question I get asked all the time is, what is it about the city you and Andrew love so much?

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Well, for starters - I am a very nostalgic hearted person, so the fact that Andrew and I lived the first 6 years of our life together there - it's comfortable for us. It just seems like the background our life should be lived on.

We both love the diversity that a city brings - the fact that you can find food, businesses and people from all walks of life within a few blocks of our house brings excitement to us. We love that we can enjoy city life at any time day or night - whether it's stopping by our favorite coffee shop that opens up at 6am when we head out for a morning stroll, or heading out for a late night dessert at our favorite restaurant (and we still have been known to do that with Miss Stella since she's quite the night owl and loves to sleep in!).

Boil it down, we just love to spend time together. And city living provides a million bajillion things we can do together, whether we're participating as part of our community life, or feeling completely anonymous on a walk together in a place we've never been before.

But seriously - I just love to know what other people love about living together in the city. Is it dinner alfresco at your favorite restaurant, an afternoon in any of our parks that become a mini oasis' in between skyscrapers and traffic jams, or the community that IS your apartment building - what is your city love?

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Share with us what your favorite thing to do together in the city with your partner , write it in the comments below, and we'll throw your name in a hat for a $10 Starbucks giftcard to enjoy a drink with your city love! GO!