On finding and losing ourselves

Up until the other day, all the frames that hung above my desk were empty. They were still filled with the stock photo that they came with...and the quote on all 4 of them said "Art Enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time". Lost and found. The dichotomy of loss and gain is the balance that life needs. Without it we are too much or not enough.

But to loose ourself or be open hearted to any new idea...there is a small grief. Grief of a beloved idea, grief of new curiosities pursuing us. Both gain & loss requires bravery. And trust. And determination. In that we find equilibrium.

My work has come from both gain and loss in the past 12 months.

12 months ago I thought my calling was to tell City Stories. Plain and simple. Stories of skylines and the people who lived in them. Born from a love developed for a place, and it became stale in my attempts to make it happen.

And as I dug to create from a place of pure sincerity, I found city stories to be the part of art i needed to lose. And that was hard. To loosen myself from this idea that had been at the heart of so much of my drive and my story.

But art, as art can do, helped me find myself again. At a deeper place. A more honest and open place.

Because while my calling as a photographer is to marriage, the deepest level of my call is to story.

Hither & Hold. Alicia Sturdy. Whatever I create on a page or with a photograph. It's not about marriage. It's not about weddings. It's not about websites. It's not about logos. It's not about the frames. It's not about the albums. It's not about iMacs and watercolors.

It's about the story. The journey.

It's a spark...whatever that may be. A vow, a loss, a gain, an inspiration. That creates more than just a flash of light that burns out faster than it was created, it's a flame. That when coaxed burns brighter than in those first moments of inception.

The fan to the flame is remembering the story. To believe that each moment in the story shapes who we are and that it's worthy to be called attention to.

The darkest moments, the brightest days.

This Altar, this act that ensures we will remember the pain or joy or sorrow or goodness of that moment - create threads of in your life...your journey...that weave together to create the testimony to whatever the altar holds.